KarmaKona

i’m afraid that i’m destined to be a loner. it’s just my position. i will always “get along” but not “be a part of.”

I like the word “retrospectively.” It denies the thought that what is in the past stays in the past. Things can be fixed, altered. What has happened doesn’t have to remain, you can still do something about it.

When I’m looking at something that seems dumb on my computer in class, I am terribly, pathetically aware that the people behind me are scoffing.

i’m sad and content.

At this point, it feels like a competition of “who can avoid the other the most.”

i’m shy around my dad.

Cara

okay okay okay here’s what i’m going to do but you’re not supposed to read it. im going to make a list of things you dont know about me. and im going to try very very hard to make sure they are all things you definitely do not know, and that are definitely completely true. but dont read it.

Okay.

so,

I think that some of the people around me have become comfortable with the idea that I’m stupid and I’m not sure whether that makes me frustrated and upset or happy at its ability to lower the bar.

One time I got home really early on a saturday morning and there was nothing to do so I went through my brother’s dvds and found the the 2nd, 3rd, and 4th seasons to nip/tuck. I thought it looked dumb but i put it in anyways. I didn’t leave my bed for two days until i finished them, i was that pathetic and it was that intriguing.

i HATE my group of friends here.

I just stopped taking birth control because it was annoying and expensive.

I have a hard time falling asleep next to guys.

PBR is my favorite because of the way the can looks. it looks old and i like old things.

the best thing in the world is laying with someone with your legs tangled up and no time limits and lots of things to say.

i want to get bundled up from head to toe and put on goggles and lay face up in the street right now.

i’m nervous i dont have the capacity to write something longer than a few paragraphs that’s any good. most of my talent seems to only manifest itself within small blurbs.

i think i am done. mostly because i dont even know if you are seeing any of this haha.

and im not sure why i just did that.

to give comfort and empathy without words getting in the way: just raw, unadulterated presence, Zen mindfulness at its best.